Encased in a World of Darkness
by More Dead Ponies
Summary: I am alone in the world. My eyes are unseeing, my ears broken. The only one who I know is Hope, the little voice that whispers thoughts into my head. I will never know the others in this strange place. It is all I have known, but it is still full of mystery. Unknown to all, my thoughts will flourish. My name is Wish.
1. Chapter 1

I am alone in this world.

I am encased in a world of darkness. My eyes are sightless, my ears broken. It feels as if I shouldn't exist. All I know is the scents and taste of the forest, the cats that surround me.

Nothing has ever been clear to me. The nudges others give me are all I have to guide myself, as well as scents of their fur, the curve of claws or brush of a tail. I know that we, myself and the others, live together. I sleep in an area, far from most of them, with a wall of lush leaves to guard me. No one else bothers me there.

I have never known my name. All I have ever known is the darkness and silence that the world has given me. There is a tiny voice inside my head, a whisper, that tells me things I can't figure out, sometimes right, sometimes wrong. I don't know what the others call me. I must have some name to them, a name I will never know. To me, my name is Wish.

I don't know why I chose that name for myself. Maybe it was because of my constant wishing for my sight or hearing to come, as if it had only been lost and then found. Maybe it is because I wished to meet the others; to truly see my littermates. Whatever it was, the voice told me that Wish was my name.

These cats around me are peculiar. Each have a unique scent that sets them apart. Their real names will always be a mystery to me, but the voice in my head has created names for me to remember them as. The milkgiver is called Flower, because of her sweet scent and encouraging gestures. My mind carved out a mental image of her; a long body with strong muscles and bright eyes.

There is another, a tom, with an aura of power around him. Other cats seem very reliant on him. I call him Flame. I can just imagine his strong claws that kill the prey for us to eat. The voice in my head says that other cats hunt too, helping to feed us, but Flame seems to be above them all.

* * *

I decided to name the voice in the back of my head Hope, because that is what it is. It is a piece of hope, the only way I can survive in this place. Hope tells me where to go, who to follow, to navigate my home. Even though the other cats help, I can't hear them like I can hear Hope.

The forest outside still taunts me. I have never been allowed to leave the camp and dens where we sleep. The others probably think that I can't be trusted out there, in harms way. I'm most likely just another piece of dead weight. A hungry mouth that can't feed herself. I can barely tell where others are, but finding and killing prey would be impossible.

Hope tells me that the other cats my age are training out in the forest. I would be jealous, if I was even able to navigate the forest without scaring off all the prey. Maybe one day I will be able to be like them, moving through the bushes and trees with ease. It would take lots of work, to see the forest with only my powers of scent and touch. One day, I hope to.

Something shook me from my thoughts, the rough prodding of a paw against my pelt. opening my mouth, I breathed deeply, the sharp tang of the cats fur washing over my tongue. This was a cat Hope and I had named Fang, mostly for his strong, sharp fangs and claws that had pricked me on multiple occasions. In my mind, Hope helped me to etch out an outline of him.

In my head, he is tall and grizzled, fur long and sticking up in places. His eyes have dulled with the anger and fierceness of past years. He would be a great cat in my opinion if he wasn't so violent.

I stand on my shaking paws, guided out of my den by his tail that flickers on my head and whiskers to make sure I am moving in the right direction. Now that I am in the open, scents of the other cats barrage me from all sides. Some have a sweet, tangy scent, while others smell like dirt. There are a few that have tried to be nice to me, but they will never know me. I am just in my own bubble of darkness that surrounds me.

` Fang continues, twisting through the tunnels of ferns and bushes that make up our camp. There, in the center, is the fresh-kill pile. Several types of prey lay there, some stale by a few hours, others brought in by others recently. I reach down to grab a piece of prey, the scents filling my mouth almost unbearably close, but I am pulled back.

I hiss at Fang, who backs off slightly in shock.

_Why would he stop me from eating? _I think, but Hope comes in.

**(A/N To make things easy, Wish's thoughts are in italics and Hope's replies are in bold.)**

** It must be something important,** Hope replies. **Fang might have brought you here for something else. Something besides fresh-kill.**

I try to push Hope into the back of my head to focus on the camp around me. Flame approaches, his presence making everyone still. I imagine them all shrinking back, hiding from his commanding presence. I stay completely still, not aware of where I am compared to the cats and walls around me. But he is approaching me.

I feel his pelt brush mine, and I flinch back. _What could they want with me?_

**Be calm,** whispers Hope. I straighten my back, trying to sit tall and brave.

Suddenly, Flame is gone, and all the other cats are gathering. My nose is confused with the scents of all the cats, at least twenty of them, so close. It is almost suffocating, the heat of their pelts burning my body and forcing its way into my stomach. I feel that I might vomit.

The cats still, their attention most likely on Flame. He has now climbed onto the rock, above us. I recall one time, when I was very young, scrambling up there, then falling. The rough rocks below left scars that still burn on my pelt. He is so confident, completely calm by his scents. I have learned to rely solely on my sense of smell to find emotions and position, and have become pretty good.

I sense the slight vibrations in the rocky ground as one cat, one I recognize from my early kit days with Flower, join Flame on the rock. He is nervous, but excited at the same time.

_What is going to happen? _I wonder.

**Remember him from before? **counters Hope.

_Yes. Dusk, isn't it?_

**Yes. Dusk and his littermates were only a few moons younger than you. They are now old enough to train, so they are receiving that permission.**

Normally, I don't question Hope. She is usually right when explaining the world unseen from me. There is no one else who I can here, so I need to trust her, no matter what. _Will I ever get to go up there and be able to train?_

Before Hope can even answer, something shoves into me. I stumble forward, the pads on my paws scraping against rock. Again, I am struck in the side, and decide that it is no use fighting. I may as well walk the best I can to avoid being even a worst mistake to the others. There is a gentle slope, leading me up until I can smell Flame's pelt beside me. I sit, trying to stay as straight as possible.

Flame's hot breath ruffles my fur slightly. I assume that he is speaking to the other cats, maybe about me. For what seems like forever, his breath falls onto my pelt. The word he speaks are hollow to me. I can't hear them, but Hope does try to explain in my mind.

**This is it, Wish**, she whispers. **They are letting you train.**

_How would you know? _I ask. _You are a part of me, and I can't hear._

**I have ways. Your ears may be broken, but they are still there. Maybe there is a secret inside you that you never know.**

I ponder this for a moment. A secret inside of me seems unlikely. All I know is myself and the scents of the others and our camp. I would think that every part of me had been revealed by now. But maybe there is a possibility that there is more than me then I will ever know.

_**So, how do you like it? I might continue it, just for fun. I just had this idea of writing from a point of view of a Clan cat that was born both blind and deaf, and the thoughts that would go through their head. With this story, since 'LeafClan's Beginning' is still my main project, chapters will be fairly short. I'm just warning you. Also, to help with the next chapter that I have already started, here are the allegiances. I decided to make this occur in LeafClan, my original Clan from my forum and other stories.**_

LeafClan

Leader- Smokestar -Flame- Smokey gray tom with fiery amber eyes

Deputy- Briarfang -Fang- Dark brown tom with unusually long claws and fangs; bright green eyes

Medicine Cat- Stripedwhisker- ginger tom with tabby stripes and green eyes

Medicine cat apprentice -Hollystream- dark gray she-cat with blue-green eyes

Warriors

Ravenleap-Black tom with golden eyes

Mentor to Duskpaw

Aspenclaw- cream-colored tom with amber eyes

Hawkpath- gray she-cat with light brown tabby stripes and gold eyes

Pineblaze- brown tom with amber eyes

Mentor to Flamepaw

Honeyfrost-Flower- light gold she-cat with green-blue eyes

Thornheart- Brown tom with light orange eyes

Goldstream- Golden she-cat with green eyes

Mentor to Leafpaw

Willowstripe- White and gray she-cat with tabby stripes and blue-green eyes

Streamfur- Blue-gray tom with amber eyes

Dawnwing- Light gray she-cat with green eyes

Mentor to Spottedpaw

Apprentices

Flamepaw- orange tom with white paws and green eyes(Brother to Spottedpaw)

Duskpaw-Dusk- dark gray tom with green eyes(Brother to Rosepaw)

Rosepaw- tan shecat with golden eyes(Sister to Duskpaw)

Spottedpaw- white she-cat with dappled brown spots and blue-green eyes(Sister to Flamepaw)

Leafpaw- light sand-colored she-cat with amber eyes(Sister to Lostpaw)

Wish- Lostpaw- Light gray she-cat with unseeing blue eyes, deaf. Currently has no mentor because of diasbilities. (Sister to Leafpaw)

Queens

Emberwing- ginger she-cat with gold eyes.

Kits

Ivykit- cream-colored she-cat with light green eyes

Frostkit- light blue-gray tom with blue eyes

Elders

White-eye- light brown tom with one misty, unseeing eye and one green eye

**Keep an eye on this list, because I will be adding names that Wish makes for her Clanmates in the -lines-. Please review! And if you want, you can come up with some of Wish's names for the other cats, that I might use. Byes! -Graymist**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey everyone! This chapter is a little different, shown by Flamepaw's point of view. I didn't want to run out of things for Wish, so Flamepaw is viewing her life as an outsider. Hope you enjoy it! Also, I know I said shorter chapters, but Flamepaw tends to over think things...**

**Review!**

Chapter 2

Everyone was surprised when Lostkit became an apprentice.

When she was born to Honeyfrost, Lostkit was doomed. Her sister, now Leafpaw, was perfectly fine, but Lostkit acted strange since the beginning. She didn't react to anything. No shouting could wake her, and her eyes were empty. Even now, moons after, she has still not learned to talk.

She stumbled up the Highrock, mewling. Poor Lostkit, she probably had no idea what was happening. Smokestar tried to calm her, stroking her light gray fur with his tail until she stopped fighting the urge to escape. Then, something happened that we never imagined.

"LeafClan, as you know, our dear Lostkit is both blind and deaf, but nothing is preventing her from becoming one of us. By the powers of StarClan, I call upon my warrior ancestors to look down on this kit. She faces many hardships, and has more to come, but we wish for her to become an apprentice to learn the ways of your noble code and defend the Clan. Lostkit, from this moment onward, until you receive your warrior name, you shall be known as Lostpaw. The Clan will help you to train as you strive to earn your warrior name."

Lostpaw stared at Smokestar, her blue eyes unblinking, not taking in anything. Her head tilted slightly to one side, giving her a confused expression. A thin trail of saliva dripped from her mouth, clumsily licked away with her tongue. I felt a bit sad for her, not knowing what was going to happen, or what was already happening. Her light gray fur ruffled slightly in the wind.

"Lostpaw! Lostpaw! Lostpaw! Lostpaw!" the Clan cheered after a moment of shocked silence. Honeyfrost's blue-green eyes sparked brightly, proud to see her disabled kit becoming an apprentice.

Leafpaw, Lostpaw's sister, sat beside me. For as long as I have known her, Leafpaw has had nothing to do with her sister. She avoids even coming near Lostpaw, most likely trying to shake off the fact that they are even related. It must have been something, a disappointment since they were the youngest kits, that led her to hate her sister. She wanted some sort of friend to play with, and was given a scrap of fur that couldn't listen or talk to her.

* * *

I wake up groggy, Pineblaze's frantic yowling pulling me further from my dreams. Shaking the scraps of moss from my fur, I dash out of my den. The apprentices sleep in a fairly small cavern at the end of a short tunnel, that leads into the bottom-most part of our stone hollow. In a similar tunnel beside ours, the warriors make their nests. Across is the medicine cat's den, where Stripedwhisker and Hollystream rest.

Pushing through the smooth stone tunnel, I can feel the early morning rays of light from the sun soak into my pelt. My paws feel light as they retrace the steps that I take every day. Pineblaze, my mentor, loves the dawn patrols. He is alway energetic in the mornings, ready to take on the day, even for an older warrior.

I see his brown pelt, the familiar scars tracing down his sides, slicing through almost black tabby stripes. One ear is torn at the tip, from a battle he fought before I was even born. His amber eyes see everything, sharp as an eagle, which we commonly see living so close to the mountains. He never misses anything, not even my slightest mistake. Because of that, I have to be perfect for him.

"Hurry up, Flamepaw," he growls. "We have to patrol near the SnowClan border today."

SnowClan. That word freezes in my head. Everyone has heard of them, and occasionally their medicine cat will come to use our mooncrystal, but they are still a mystery. Leafpaw told me once that see saw a SnowClan patrol once, but they are rare. We are so far apart that the borders almost never need checked, just strengthened.

"Who else is going?" I ask, avoiding saying something stupid that could upset him.

"Leafpaw, Goldstream, Ravenleap, Duskpaw, and Dawnwing will be joining us."

My heart leaps at the mention of Leafpaw. The patrolling won't feel so bad with a friend to talk with. But Duskpaw could be a problem. As a new apprentice, he won't know anything about the other Clan, SnowClan, borders, prey, or any of the other things that Leafpaw and I have learned. He will most likely be asking us questions, so we won't be able to talk together on the long walk. Pineblaze might even make Leafpaw and I do some battle moves or show some hunting skills to him. That would ruin everything.

I notice Goldenstream's brilliant gold pelt shine from the corner of his eye, Leafpaw by her side. As always, Leafpaw sat calm, with her tail tucked neatly at her paws, yet poised and ready for action. She was a brave, strong cat, worthy of becoming a great warrior, even a hero. She would be the best, if the thought of Lostpaw dragging her down, just by relation, didn't cause her to think otherwise. She had abandoned her sister, and was still ashamed by even knowing her, sharing a nest with her as kits. The strangest things always seem to block our paths.

Ravenleap crawls from the warriors' den, his eyes unaware an muscles groggy from sleep. Only two moons ago, he was made a warrior, a given Duskpaw as his first apprentice. This came as a shock to most of the Clan, seeing that Ravenleap was fairly unfocused and usually forgot to do the simplest of tasks. I felt that Smokestar would give him an apprentice no matter what, just to prove the Clan wrong.

The cats gathered around myself and Pineblaze, as he began to discuss the patrol that we were to go on.

"We are going to the Highcliffs to mark the SnowClan borders. This is a long way from our normal hunting grounds, and a very long distance for our new apprentice, Duskpaw. I suggest that you each eat a piece of fresh-kill before we leave to help keep your strength for the journey."

"Wait, where is Dawnwing?" Leafpaw asked. "Isn't she coming?"

"Yes." Pineblaze sighed. "I suppose I'll go fetch her. You can eat, and then we will leave."

Our group nodded to Pineblaze, dashing to the fresh-kill pile. I followed a bit behind, my paws sluggish. Why did we have to have Duskpaw with us? At first, it seemed fine, but he would slow us down. Only a few days out of the nursery, he could scare off prey or alert dangerous predators, like the eagles and mountain lions, of where we were. Why couldn't we take my sister, Spottedpaw instead? She was annoying, but at least she wouldn't hold the group back.

"Hey, Flamepaw!" Leafpaw shouts, breaking me away from my thoughts. In her jaws, she holds a plump squirrel, ripe from the abundant leaf-green. "Do you want to share this with me?"

I jog over to the pile, right beside my friend. We begin to tear into the tender flesh, letting the meat melt in our mouths and ripping out the twig-like bones. She doesn't know anything about the way I feel about her. At first our friendship was simple, me helping her to train past the limits of her sister that she despised. I didn't know that she hated Lostpaw back then, I only knew that she was disappointed in having a weak littermate, one that she couldn't count on.

I swipe my long, pink tongue over my muzzle, wiping away the remains of the meal. Leafpaw stands, burying the fur and bones in a small hole that she pawed into the ground. She stood, and I trail her as she makes her way to Pineblaze and Goldenstream. The others finish their quick meals, and bound towards us. Pineblaze gives a flick of his tail, signaling for us to follow him.

Claws scrape against the rough bark to the Branch. At the top of the camp is a lone tree, perched on the edge of a dangerous drop. The Branch is one thick branch of the tree that runs along the side of the camp, the end dropping down. This is the only way in and out of the camp, and is made so that kits can't escape on their own.

We pass the elders' den and nursery, both sitting two tail-lengths off the ground. Stones prod from their entrances, allowing a place for cats to land in order to enter the dens. At the top, a cave is gorged out of the stone. This is our leader, Smokestar's, den.

The rim of the hole that forms our camp approaches. I haul myself to the thickest part of the grass, then jump down onto the solid ground. Long grasses surround us in the open fields, scraping the air above our heads. The sky is crisp and blue, with only a few puffs of white clouds dotting it. Pineblaze, Leafpaw, and the rest of the patrol land beside me, and Pineblaze takes the lead once again, his nose thrust into the direction of the mountains.

Everyone else falls into place behind him. I stay as close to my mentor's side as I can, but avoid straying in front of him. I don't want to seem too full of myself to a senior warrior. Leafpaw pads beside me, her amber eyes sparkling with excitement. She really is beautiful, despite all she has been through. I guess at times both of us wish it could have turned out different, that Lostpaw could be normal, that she didn't have to be pulled down.

The blanket of crisp leafs that never fade begin to take over the moor, smaller trees dotting the landscape. Birdsong floats down from high branches, and the undergrowth is alive with the voices of the small animals that we hunt. Squirrels chatter above us, teasing us as they scatter and scramble through the trees with almost unreal ease. Larger trees sprout, looming over the small ones, and completely enclosing us into the forest.

Leafpaw nudges my side. "I bet I could catch one of those squirrels before you can."

I give a light chuckle. "I'd like to see you try."

I fall behind the patrol just a fox-length. No one notices except Leafpaw, who is slowly slipping away from the other side of the path. The forest is even denser here. I'm sure Pineblaze won't mind us hunting for a second. He will be too busy navigating us there to look back and notice us gone.

"Hey, where are you going?" a voice mews behind me. Almost covered in the bushes, I peer out. Someone caught me. I should have been quicker and more stealthy. Then I could show Leafpaw who the better hunter is.

I climb out from the underbrush. "Okay, you got me," I meow, pretending to surrender at whoever caught me. But instead of a warrior, there is Duskpaw, his eyes wide.

I knew it. This little furball was going to be trouble at some time, and now, at the one moment I needed to not be annoyed, he showed up. I figure if I tell him some story he will leave me alone, but that is sadly not the case.

"Hey, Flamepaw! I want to go with you! Where are you going?"

My mind spins, deciding what story to tell the new apprentice. Finally, it settles on one, soon enough that he won't be able to tell if it is the truth or not. "Oh, I'm just leaving for a moment to go make some dirt. You might not want to come."

Duskpaw's face scrunches, probably imagining it. "No thanks then. I'll pass."

Yes! I got the furball out of my fur! Now, to go find a squirrel...


	3. Chapter 3

I suppose this is what power feels like. Something has changed in my home since I was push on that rock. The others seem to accept me more, surround me more. But what do I know? I can only smell them and feel their touch to be guided around. My navigation has incresed greatly, but I still stumble into walls and dens. I will never be perfect.

But this sense of authority has been passed to me. It feeling like every cat is bending to my will. But how can they? They know nothing about me, and will never know. Maybe another cat, or even all of them, share a longing. But they have everything. They can see whatever makes this land, every detail on every cat. What am I? I'm just the empty weight that must be carried. I wish for a day when I can see, but it will never come. I know.

Hope has tried to explain what is going on, but my imaginestion is too pressed to fit it all together. I have noticed that different cats have tried to lead me around every day, to the prey, dirtplace, and through the hole that we live in. It is weird, being treated like I am helpless, but in turn I really am. If I wasn't with these cats, I would have been dead long ago. Death still tries to pull me in now and them, suffocating me as I sleep, but letting me go before it takes me.

These cats that I have to follow have such different personalities, I have learned. Some are constantly trying to attack me, but holding back. They have put many small scrathes in my sides, but I'm strong to ignore them. If Flower ever saw them, maybe she would save me, but I'm sure she wishes I didn't exist too. I may be her own kit, but I feel that I am alone besides Hope and a few cats who are kind to me, nudging me and soothing my shaking body with licks to my pelt.

Ever since I was on that rock, pushed up there by the others, I have had to sleep with other cats. I can no longer try to hide in my little leaf-covered place by myself. Now I have to carefully navigate their bodies when going to my nest, which proves a challenge. I have never been confident anywhere but my thoughts, and now I am in the open, an easy target.

They still haven't let me leave the camp. I can smell the lush plant life, whispering to me, wishing that I could reach it. Poking my nose around camp, I have found the only way out is a long, thin path. There is no way I could ever get out that way. I need to find my own exit, a safe way to explore. But once I'm free, the dangers would come. Hope says there are things out there that could easily eat me, kill me. I have no fear of them, for it would almost be nice to put me out of my misery. Maybe once I die I can see and hear. That would be nice.

Something whacks into my side, causing me to cringe. A deep, sharp scent fills my nostrils. It's Fang, here to take me out of this soft den where my thoughs let me escape. Now I have to stumble out into that place again, shere they shoved me forward into the rocks, where they harm me. I know when my time comes, I will be too covered in scars to have lived anyway at the rate this is going.

Once again those small picks of claws poke my side, guidinng me. I have to stay calm. These others already think bad enough of me the way it is. He is probably just leading me to get food, possiblly somewhere else like that. Nothing exciting. Why must I be cursed to like like this? Living has no purpose for me, it seems.

I follow his pawsteps the best I can, avoid being scratched again. I wish someone would see what he does to me. Maybe they would stop it. Or I could give in and let death take over like it has trying to do for moons. Death seemed welcoming now. Why should I fight when there is to little to do? I have no purpose here, but apparently Flame, Fang, and the others want something out of me. They want something I cannot give.

Something isn't right. I follow what I can smell, and sense in the vibrations in the ground. My disablities have improved what I can do, and I have been able too feel through the air and ground for some things. But this can't be right. Fang's steps are moving away from the scent of the fresh-kill pile, into something more dank and uneasy. My stomach lurhces a bit, but I know I must follow to aviod his claws and teeth on my back.

The warmth of the sunshine leaves my pelt, replaced by chilled shivers. A drop of liquid, wet and cold falls onto my fur, and I reach my head back to lick it off. Like usually, it takes a moment to reach to correct place as the taste of foul water touches my tongue. I spit it out, and continue to follow Fang, who was waiting patiently in front of me. His presence has become strangly comforting, despite his agressiveness towards me. I know he at least cares about me enough to let me live. They could of left me in the forest a long time ago.

More foul water falls, but I give up on trying to dry my pelt. I don't know what I look like anyway, so why should it matter? But the stench on this place takes over, my sense of navigation drifting away. Soon enough Fang is having to push and pull me along onto the right paths. Cold shivers race through my veins, numbing my pads as they trudge forward. They is this _nothingness _that consumes me. Hope has remainded silent, for what reason I cannot know.

For once crisp, shining moment, I feel free, but that soon ends. I stumble forward, crashing into a solid wall. The throbbing pain explodes in my mind, blocking out everything else. I let my legs buckle beneath me, the rest of my body encasing itself in a bubble of cold that the floor seems to release. Something cloaks over me, tearing into my scruff. What if Fang wants me to move? I can lay here. Not like is anything I can do.

**Wish, come on, get up. **Hope whispers, her voice a strange break in my endless silence.

_No, _I will back. _There is nothing here. He is taking me to my death, so I may as well stay here. _

**Go. **

Her words are final, Hope's will pushing me to my feet and Fang half-draggs me further. As if I have finally realeased a breath I had been holding, the sunlight blazes over my pelt again. Fang's grip looses on my scuff, the ground meeting my body, but the impact is softened. Pawing it gently, I lift myself from this squishy terrain.

The scent of vegatation floods over my jaws. This is it.

I have reached the forrest.

**Okay, okay, I know what you are thinking. Why haven't I updated in two months? Well, as you might think, writing for this story is difficult, and my mind kept wandering making it even harder. And on top of that, there are two other fics I have been working on. Enough excuses, time for you to review!**


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